Starting Over....Again

Well, I've put it off long enough and decided it was time to roll up my sleeves and dig in. Yesterday, I went to South High School Urban Academy to begin working on my room. After obtaining the keys to the Art rooms, (oh right, I get full use of BOTH Art rooms since I'm going to be the only Art teacher in the building) I walked into Rm. 317, turned on the lights and took in my new teaching environment. The floors were polished and shiny, the stools were perched on the tables, my new desk was bare, but there seemed to be a lot of junk to sort through and pitch out. It's funny how I seem to have a difficult time keeping my house organized, yet somehow relish the organizing my workspace. Although I hadn't really wanted to make this move, there's something cathartic about each new school year. That's when I felt it, that familiar feeling you get that trickles down the full length of your spine, that harbinger that announces to you that...you're about to sweat your @$$ off. I think I may now know what the firepits of Hell feel like. So, it became clear that my first order of business is to obtain some fans!! Needless to say, I didn't get much done yesterday.

Today, I brought along some bright posters and visuals to add color and vibrancy to my drab rundown walls. Then, I plugged in the two fans I managed to find in the rooms, since I haven't made a trip out to purchase any of my own. I began pitching things: boxes of mutilated magazines (that probably could have been used, but with so many other non-mutilated magazines around, I just saw no sense in keeping it), dust laden papier-mache sculptures (whose time had passed), an old box of scrap construction paper (the paper was passed its prime and the students wouldn't have used it, so despite my recycling inclination when it comes to Art materials, it had to go)and an old broken paper cutter (why save this for so long when they had 3 others between the two rooms?)just to name a few. I gave the custodians fair warning and they seemed glad that the junk was finally being dealt with, so long as I didn't scuff the floors.

As far as my mental/emotional state is concerned, I've been trying to remain somewhat detached because I know how unstable my school district is, but I just don't think it's possible for me to do anything without putting my heart and soul into it. Which is good. I'd really be worried if that spark had been lost. I would never want my students to get the impression that I don't care, because that is NEVER the case. I just don't want to get too comfortable just yet. My gut is telling me that I'm gonna need to stay on my toes, especially since this is an entirely new situation for me and I really don't know anyone just yet. Last year I dove head first into welcoming waters because I was selected to be a part of the team. I was confident and excited since I knew I had support. This year, I'm hesitant and struggle with my confidence because SO MUCH has changed that it's at times overwhelming. I feel like I have no idea what's expected of me, like I'm adrift and rudderless, but I know in my heart that I will find a way to pull this year off. I just thoroughly hate feeling vulnerable and right now, that's how I'm feeling.

On a more positive note, I HAVE managed to make the principal smile and have begun charming the secretary. I've also met the woman that will be working with the students who tend to have anger management or behavioral issues. She seems to be pretty gung-ho about things and really want to build a collaborative relationship with my program and has even offered to assist me with the yearbook. I really hope that this turns out to be as good as it sounds, but I'm gonna be guardedly optimistic towards her because I don't really know her track record and how well she follows through with things. In the immortal words of the 80s rock band Asia--"Only Time Will Tell".

Flatliner No More

Hi. Well, once again I have managed to resuscitate my poor little blog. I really have no excuses for not posting in the past month or so, but for those not completely up to speed, here's the abbreviated version:

I completed my grad school portfolio and attained my Master's degree.

Helped with my middle school's track team for a few weeks.

Got staff reduced from my middle school at the last minute.

I thought I might be spared, but then wasn't able to be, so I was forced to go to the job fair and wait for my name to be called (via seniority) and select from the available job openings. Coulda been worse, I could've been out of a job, but it still sucked nonetheless since I truly loved my school and the staff.

Joined a recreational softball team with some of the middle school staff which ran late into July due to rain. We weren't too successful, but had fun anyway.

Went to my new school (I've moved up to high school now, so I'm gonna have to teach an all new set of curricula again) and was greeted by my new principal in a less than welcoming manner, which is not leaving me looking forward to the fall. Thank God I'm not getting evaluated this year.

Throughout all of this I also dealt with the contractors from hell as I tried desperately to have my one full bathroom renovated. The low point was having to bathe using a washcloth and the sink for a few days, because the guys installing my shower were INCOMPETENT.

So, rather than turn my blog into a relentless bitch session, I decided to table it and give myself some time to just heal and vent in other ways. I'm back now, and hopefully I'll come up with some interesting stuff to share from time to time. If not, I'll just make shit up and most of you will be none the wiser---LOL. Thanks for continuing to check in here looking for signs of life. Sorry it took me so long to return.

Chris